i barfeds in our rink
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
is wine microwaveable?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
