We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
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