I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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