I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
