her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
