I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
