At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
