that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
