So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
