sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
