I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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