I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I just found a bag of teeth...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
