kristin has been a bad kristin
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
