Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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