I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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