I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
