i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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