Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
