u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
