like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
