well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
FUCK WHALES
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