Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Randomize
