i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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