We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
