thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
They have beer where we have blood.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
