Me too!
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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