I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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