K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
