I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Randomize
