Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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