when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
