had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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