I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
