yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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