Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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