All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
