It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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