so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Randomize
