hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
