I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
