I puked a lego.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
