I wish i was in the wii world.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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