OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
