i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
