the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
And then the night went full on bisexual.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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