Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Randomize