Christians are straight up FREAKS
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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