We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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