my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
