dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
